Stop Bending Over - Align Your Life For Radical Success
Welcome to the Stop Bending Over Podcast with Rita Marie Mendez. I’m on a mission to support women to get unstuck, love themselves completely and live the life of their dreams.This podcast isn’t about your lower back pain - it’s about bending over forwards and backwards to either feel screwed or overdo and meet everyone else’s needs, including our businesses, and not fill up our own tanks and desires. For more than a decade in my work as a Transformational Life + Business Coach, I’ve coached women to manifest their dream life, from the inside out. On this show I'll do what I love best - coaching you to actionable strategies both divine and human that inspire and connect you to your authentic self that holds all the wisdom you need to unleash an extraordinary life.Each week I'll share new tools and skills to master this thing we call life!
Stop Bending Over - Align Your Life For Radical Success
(#47) The Messy Middle: Why You Feel Stuck (and How to Move Anyway)
👉 Ready to move out of the messy middle and into your next level? Join us inside Wealth & Wisdom dm me for an exclusive invite 💫
Episode Summary:
In this powerful episode, Rita unpacks the psychological and spiritual threshold we all face in the “messy middle” the in-between phase of desiring change but feeling frozen in fear. Drawing from real-life examples, nervous system science, and transformational coaching, she shares how to move from fear to aligned action using three life-changing tools.
Whether you're standing in the doorway of your next chapter or circling your vision with doubt, this episode gives you the clarity and courage to take the next step forward—messy middle and all.
Top 5 Takeaways:
Liminality = The Messy Middle
It’s the transitional space between your old self and your new self
Fight, Flight, or Freeze Isn’t Just for Gazelles
Humans stay frozen in survival mode because our perception keeps our nervous system activated long after the threat is gone.
Tool #1: The 90-Second Rule
Allow yourself to feel fear fully for 90 seconds, then ask: “What would I do if I trusted myself right now?”
Tool #2: Future Self Journaling
Write daily as your future self—what you decide, think, and no longer tolerate
Tool #3: Flip Fear with a New Question
When fear masquerades as logic, ask: “What if it works better than I imagined?” and choose faith over fear
Time Stamps:
03:10 The concept of liminality and standing in the threshold
07:20 Nervous system dysregulation and how humans freeze
10:00 Why you can’t “figure it out” from a fear-based mind
12:40 External excuses (economy, market, etc.) and reclaiming agency
21:30 Tool #1 – The 90-Second Rule for emotional release
24:00 Tool #2 – Future Self Journaling + daily prompts
29:10 Tool #3 – Fear masquerading as logic and how to flip it
33:10 How we unconsciously justify playing small
40:30 Reframing “I’m stuck” and rewriting your internal story
Resources & Next Steps:
✨ Wealth & Wisdom Coaching Program Starts May 14th!!
DM @ritamariemendez or email admin@ritamarieconsulting.com to apply or schedule a clarity call
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Links/Resources:
Rita's Website: Go to the Website
Contact us here: admin@ritamarieconsulting.com